ThumperManX
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Cap'n Crunch
Driver: Cap'n Crunch
This cereal mascot was a captain of the high seas, fighting soggies who would ruin his cereal and twarting the Crunchium Thieves who stole the main ingredient. However, it would all come crashing down when the First Lady, an upity Health Nazi, had the White House pressure Quaker Oats to retire his commercials. Angered, he enters Twisted Metal to make her walk the plank Vehicle: Pirate Ship Car
Built from the torn remains of the Good Ship Guppy, this vehicle dosen't have high armor, but it make up for it with the cannon, as its Special Weapon fires explosive, deadly Crunchberries straight ahead.
ENDING:
(The pirate ship car speeds into Calypso's lair as Cap'n Crunch steps out.)
Calypso: Congratulations, Captain, you have won Twisted Metal and may now clai your prize.
Cap'n: Prize? You mean like those cheap trinkets they put in my cereal?
Calypso: That's a misconception. As winner, you can wish for any prize, regardless of its size, make, or even value.
Cap'n: Then here's my wish. I wish for revenge. To make the wife of that dumbass president walk the plank for yanking my commercials on claims that my cereal is not healthy.
Calypso: Ah, a malevolant wish, and it is granted.
(Soon, a makeshift shark tank is seen with a plank above it, with a black woman in fancy clothing tied and her mouth gagged to silence her.)
Cap'n: Ah, now this reminds me of life in the high seas.
(Cap'n kicks the woman into the shark tank as the sharks inside start to chew. The tank waters stains with blood as Calypso laughs evily.)
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