Welcome, Guest. Please Login or Register
TMA - Temporary Board
 
  HomeHelpSearchLoginRegister  
 
Pages: 1 2 3 
Send Topic Print
Anger Management (Read 15919 times)
XIZOR
Tiger Woods' golf club (which is also his penis)
*
Offline



Posts: 7985
Anger Management
06/10/09 at 10:45:11
 
Ok, I dont know whats up with me lately but I have slight anger issues. Im usually a calm collected motherfucker who doesnt give a shit about anything and it takes a lot to get to me and make me angry, but lately I get more irritated than normal and this is starting to bother me.

Im a gamer, obviously, and I enjoy a fair balanced challenge in any video game, but lately I get so fucking pissed at games for no reason what-so-ever and end up whipping my controller against something solid in my room over what is essentially nothing. I know in my mind that this is stupid childish behavior but I cant help myself. This isnt like me at all. Of course if you are a hardcore gamer you are going to take things more serious when it comes to games but I normally dont get mad over anything both in games and in life this easily. Usually Im rational enough to say ok, lets just try again or lets figure out what is wrong but lately Ive just been smashing controllers like they dont fucking cost a thing. This isnt a smart choice being that controllers arent fucking cheap at all and as much as I game you would think Id be rational enough to not try and destroy something as important as the controller which helps me play all the games I love.

On top of that I have no patience for fucking around. Normally in my circle of friends we are pretty fucking harsh to each other as far as making fun of each other and this is usually fine with me. I expect my friends to bust my balls constantly and I bust their balls as well. Id normally be the first to crack jokes on my friends and I never care when they make fun of me but lately this shit just gets to me for no reason what-so-ever.

I have been under quite a bit of stress this year so far. I know TMA isnt supposed to be some fucking support group, but fuck it as there isnt much else going on in this place. I wont start spewing my problems like some whiny bitch as I know no one wants to hear that shit and no one comes to these boards to listen to someone whine about how fucking terrible their life is like everyone else doesnt have their own problems.

Few things to note: for one Ive been pretty much sober from quite a while now. No weed, no cocaine, no cigarettes, no sex, and very little alcohol compared to my past. I also currently have no job and no car. Then there is the fact that Ive been playing drums for years now and I currently have no way to do this anymore (long story). For those who ask why that matters or have never played music or drums at all, playing drums is a very physical musical instrument and Ive always had that to sort of "get my frustrations out" by being able to beat the shit out of my drums and get lost in the awesomeness that is music.

I dont know if any one thing or just a combination of these things has gotten me to the point of uncontrollable rage fits, but I was just hoping someone could give me some ways I could maybe get my frustrations and anger out in a practical and rational manner that way I dont snap at people and break expensive objects around my house. The way I feel sometimes I just want to fucking punch someones face in but Im not a violent person at all normally and I can generally keep my feelings and anger in check but lately I just have this overbearing feeling like I want to break something when things dont go right for me. Ive tried cutting back on my drinking again thinking I was just becoming an angry alcoholic but Im even more pissed and rage prone when Im sober.
Back to top
 

(Attachment deleted)

---===Asshole Of TMA===---
----===Winning===---
---===The Google Man===---
----===Alpha Admin===---
...
X1ZORTMA  
IP Logged
 
Pse7en
Ex Member


Re: Anger Management
Reply #1 - 06/10/09 at 13:01:29
 
I have been very snappy lately. I had to get a new company cell phone / Blackberry bcuz the battery died on this one. so I asked the ATT guy at the att store to give me a new battery. He said oh no you need a new phone and I paid for the phone. I went on newegg and bought a replacement battery instead. I went back to the ATT store and pretty much ripped that guy a new @$$ hole and told him to never argue with my decision if I ever came back again. I threw the box with the phone he sold me back at him and told him, give me a refund now. Dont give me any sh*t cuz im not in the mood.

I felt bad afterwards because he started stuttering and shaking. But lately I have become a very bitter person. Little motivates me anymore. Every time I go to the Docs I hope they are going to tell me its all over sometimes. I am on 3 different Anxiety meds + 2 pain meds and I have to work while I take them. More people (friends and family) around me are dying (old age, car accidents, going to jail, got very sick). I know I am full of Depression and Anger right now.

I also have no patience with anything. Ive been dealing with a short fuse alot more lately. My temper has gotten worse. I went to get a refill on my vicodin and xanex last night at the local CVS. This woman helped the lady in front of me, changed the paper in the register (didnt need to but she knew I was getting upset) and then went to help out the drive thrus. then she said, im sorry are you waiting for me? So i lost it "WHAT THE F*** DO YOU THINK I HAVE BEEN DOING??? YOU SEE ME HERE!!! YOU ARE THE ONLY ONE HERE! ARE U A FKIN MORON???? YOU THINK IM JUST STANDING HERE BCUZ I WANT TO? WERE OU ALWAYS THIS STUPID LADY? YOU LOOKED AT ME A DOZEN TIMES!!! GET MY ORDER AND GET YOUR MANAGER WHILE YOU ARE AT IT!" I then made the rest of the line wait while I reamed on both the lady behind the counter and her gorgeous floor manager.

The last incident, I was smking with some ppl outside the job in a non smoking section because the sun was out and we wanted to be warmer in the sun. this older woman comes up to me and says "ya know you are in the non smoking area and you need to move". I said thank you for that information. I then blew smoke in her face. Then, I told her to get out of my face before you get curb stomped. Then she ran to the security guard to get us to move to the smoking area and I told him dont you have something better to do, like drive around our campus with your security car and do ABSOLUTLEY nothing and go back to being useless? Hes like excuse me? I said look i am trying to enjoy this cig with some friends. I am in the non smoking area because there is no smoking area around and we only have 10 minutes. If you dont like it,  FIX IT  yourself and dont bother me. If I am gonna be aggrivated no matter what I do even when i smoke, I will snap and you wont want to be around when I snap. He gave me a dirty look and walked away.


And I miss the old TMA.
Back to top
 

(Attachment deleted)
 
IP Logged
 
Magnum
Admin
*****
Offline


What? Not now. I'm Masturbating.

Posts: 6060
Who wants the undies? Come on!
Gender: male
Re: Anger Management
Reply #2 - 06/10/09 at 14:55:34
 
Yoga maybe? Yea right....

In all seriousness, I know exactly where your comming from. Mine is completely opposite from you though. I think the biggest reason your feeling that way is you have nothing to do with all your time. Getting board as fuck would drive me nuts too.

All my shit is comming from work, family, and life in general. Work stress is not really cool. Between the way the place is run, the shit out on the streets and highways, and dumb shit that happens.....it's no wonder I haven't been unemployed yet too.

Family stress sucks as well. You can't really escape family.

Life......lol.....well, we all know the phrase for that.
Back to top
 

(Attachment deleted)

---===THE Applejuice Guy===---

---===SHITBALLS FOR LIFE!!!===---
WWW  
IP Logged
 
SynthR
Tiger Woods' golf club (which is also his penis)
*
Offline


PSN - Xbox - Steam - Discord
= SynthR

Posts: 2983
Ontario, Canada
Gender: male
Re: Anger Management
Reply #3 - 06/10/09 at 16:53:10
 
LMAO, P7 you bitter son of a bitch.

Whether you're aware of it or not stress and life in general will get to you one way or the other. One day you can be totally fine and then the next you can have a nervous breakdown over something you're not aware of. I'm going to ramble a bit but some where in here I'll make a point.

I've mentioned a few times that I suffer from generalized anxiety (It runs in the family) and I've had to learn to deal with it throughout the years but I'm stuck with this for the rest of my life. In the last 10 years my anxiety has always been over the same thing, feeling worthless. No job, no education, no relationship, no vehicle, loneliness. Just the all encompassing feeling of having nothing.

I don't want to lump you with me, Xizor but you and I are in similar boats. Honestly, I would rather be enraged than mentally crippled though, ha. Anyway, you mentioned to me the other day that you have people in your life that tell you that YOU need to change yourself. It's true, you're in control of your life and you're the only person that can change things but having people stand over you doesn't help the stress. You have to tell them to back off. My Father is like that. He doesn't understand what anxiety is and how it works. His therapy is "GET OVER IT! IT'S IN YOUR HEAD!" Sound advice Dad.

It's easy to tell someone to get a job when that person already has one. You know how many interviews I've had this year? Four at most and I've applied everywhere. Finding a job is extremely difficult these days. For me, not having a job leads to many worries. How will I pay for school, what do people think of me, how will I feed myself and be able to go out on the weekend? That's my thought process. I start to worry and think of all these negative ideas and possibilities.

Fuck I have no idea what I'm talking about anymore. I'll just get to my point. The best way that I have found to cope with stress is to stop doing whatever it is you do everyday. I found myself waking up, doing the whole shower breakfast thing and then spending the rest of my day playing video games or music or something. What a life. You have to break the routine and do different things to ease your mind. I go for walks or long bike rides just to get out. Watch TV somewhere else in the house. Read a book outside. Even rearranging things helps a lot. I had to rearrange my bedroom to help with the anxiety. There's a lot of bad memories and sleepless nights in that room. You have to break that cycle of negative thinking and take it from me, I'm a fucking pro at negative thoughts and worries. Changing your routine significantly helps.

In your case, maybe pick up a punching bag to knock the shit out of a few times a day. It's exercise, it relieves stress and you'll be too tired later to go ballistic. Exercise is a key tool to use against stress. I'm terribly out of shape now after being in a relationship for so long but I just recently fixed my bike up and have begun riding again. It's great to get back out there again like I used to. I've found that it helps a lot especially if I feel anxiety coming on. As soon as I start riding my buzzing stomach or feelings of nausea tend to disappear. In your case, Xizor, you could pick up the drums again. I don't anything about that situation but if you could somehow get a set and start playing it would probably help especially if you're still passionate about it.

Different things work for different people so you're kind of on your own when it comes to finding exactly how to correct this. My only advice is to break that cycle of daily routine and thinking. If you want to see your girlfriend find out when she will be home and try to get over to her place. You want a job just do your best to apply to places. Getting hired is out of your control. Use that anger to say fuck it and go do something. I actually used rage to get over my worst bout of anxiety years back so I know anger works extremely well in some situations.

Harness that power and fulfill your destiny to become a sith lord.
Back to top
 

(Attachment deleted)

---===Sexy Beast===---
---===Dirty Fishstick===---
---===King Axel===---
---===Mustard Man===---
---===Glowstick Commander===---
---===Grimmest of All Time (G.O.A.T)===---
---===Lousy Brawl Champion===---
WWW  
IP Logged
 
Kilrgrn
Tiger Woods' golf club (which is also his penis)
*
Offline


Catch me ridin' around
the Warehouse District.

Posts: 2246
Re: Anger Management
Reply #4 - 06/10/09 at 16:59:51
 
I'm glad I don't have kids and I love my job. Now I'm here to gloat about my life being awesome.

Only because this is the first time I've ever been able to do so!

Yet I still get irritated easily. This isn't uncommon for me, I'm mad all the time. For no reason. Actually, it's funny now that SynthR mentions it, but I'm always angry all the time because if I wasn't I'd be crying or just sad and depressed. Anger helps me so much to not have a soft side and I thank it for that. If I was depressed I wouldn't get anything done, but since it's just anger, it drives me. I say, thank you anger, it's not that bad when you think about it.

Carry on...
Back to top
 

(Attachment deleted)

---===TMA's Official Gravedigger===---
---===TM2PC Instructor General===---
---===Photoshop Master===---
...
 
IP Logged
 
XIZOR
Tiger Woods' golf club (which is also his penis)
*
Offline



Posts: 7985
Re: Anger Management
Reply #5 - 06/10/09 at 20:20:39
 
A lot of what you are saying makes sense SynthR. I do wish I had a punching bag to beat the shit out of and I wish even more that I had a bike to ride. I used to love riding my bike back when I was younger and Ive been thinking about that a lot lately. Dont know how Id get a hold of one but I think that would definitely help me. I think some form of exercise would benefit me greatly both health wise and anger wise and leave me feeling to worn out to be angry.

As far as drums go I currently dont have a set. Thats a long story and a sad one as well being that a lot of stupid decisions I made a couple years ago ultimately led to me not having them anymore. That was my one good outlet. Beating the shit out of my drums for a few hours every couple days was beyond just massive stress relief and exercise. It was something within me that I had to let out, music. Ive tried to cope without music being a part of my life but every time I do that I see the error of my ways. The thing is drums are expensive and I cant just go pick up another set. I dont have the money for all that not to mention if I did I would need that to buy a new car with.

I mean I pretty much know what my problems are and Im not in denial about any of them. The thing is ALL my stress relievers and outlets are gone in my life now but Ive been dealing with that for over a year now and I thought I was doing fine but maybe Im not. I dont know, maybe Ill walk around my neighbor hood today and hide in some bushes and wait for some bastard to come riding along on his bike and then Ill jump out and punch him in the face and steal his bike and ride around for a little while. That would make me feel good.

Btw, can someone lend me a 360 controller that still completely functions like its supposed to? Through me anger and just wear and tear mine are getting pretty pathetic.
Back to top
 

(Attachment deleted)

---===Asshole Of TMA===---
----===Winning===---
---===The Google Man===---
----===Alpha Admin===---
...
X1ZORTMA  
IP Logged
 
SynthR
Tiger Woods' golf club (which is also his penis)
*
Offline


PSN - Xbox - Steam - Discord
= SynthR

Posts: 2983
Ontario, Canada
Gender: male
Re: Anger Management
Reply #6 - 06/10/09 at 20:53:03
 
I'm no fucking athlete but exercise is good, trust me. I would lend you my other controller but I have friends over often and we usually end up playing something. If I was rich and a third controller that would be a different story. I can't believe how expensive controllers are.
Back to top
 

(Attachment deleted)

---===Sexy Beast===---
---===Dirty Fishstick===---
---===King Axel===---
---===Mustard Man===---
---===Glowstick Commander===---
---===Grimmest of All Time (G.O.A.T)===---
---===Lousy Brawl Champion===---
WWW  
IP Logged
 
NightShade
Webmaster
**********
Offline


STABBING PEOPLE IS A-OKAY!

Posts: 811
MARZ WOOP WOOP
Gender: male
Re: Anger Management
Reply #7 - 06/11/09 at 02:30:55
 
God damn, bummer city. And at the same time that’s one of the great things about TMA, it’s a group of friends you can talk to about this kind of shit.

I’m finally employed myself, but I was unemployed for about 6 months I think. I applied everywhere and got very few interviews, so I totally sympathize with everybody in that boat. It sucks because during a lot of that time I felt like I was never going to get hired, I felt like I was making zero progress. But eventually one of the places I applied to called me in and apparently the interview went well enough to get me hired. I will say that near the end of my unemployed stint I finally decided to actually work on my web design skills by making new sites for myself, and I think that helped me A. get the job, B. do the job better,  C. have something to do with my time and D. feel like I was accomplishing something. Depending on whatever your career is, this may be less feasible, but brushing up on your skills or in some way improving yourself so that you would be a greater asset I think helped me.

It’s funny, at the time I felt worthless with all that free time, but now I kind of miss it. The grass is always greener I suppose. I would suggest using this time to do whatever you enjoy and makes you feel good about yourself. I know there are some extenuating circumstances for a lot of people (see: money) that makes this difficult, but there are bound to be some things that you can do and feel good about doing. Creative stuff is always a good outlet for me – I know sometimes it’s hard to jump into something like that when you are emotionally drained, but if you can manage, I think it helps. Art, music, writing, humor, whatever.
Back to top
 

(Attachment deleted)

YOU TOTALED YOUR SUSPENSION!
WWW  
IP Logged
 
Roket
Tom Selleck's Mustache
*****************
Offline


AXEL POWER

Posts: 532
Re: Anger Management
Reply #8 - 06/13/09 at 06:41:46
 
If there is one thing I do need more in my life its anger. I'm one of the type of people that keep most stuff bottled up inside me. I just want a job but its a BITCH to find one right now. I've applied a 20 places the last couple of weeks and haven't heard from one of them yet. On top of that the applications I go through are HORRENDOUSLY long, almost seems like damn waste of time. I know I can find Seasonal work, I guess if it comes to it I'll just work my damn ass off this time and not do medicore work.. so I can actually get real job. Even if its at fucking Petsmart or Target I dont really give a fuck.

The reason why I said I needed anger in my life is because without getting angry at yourself how the fuck can you get ahead in life? That's why I really loved both Synthrs and kilrgrn's replies because I pretty much need that attitude. But like Night said no matter how "angry" I get it doesn't mean Ill get a job. ATM the only income I'll probably get is my financial aid for college and probably a seasonal job. Its not enough especially when you want to get the fuck out of your parents house.

Another reason I'm really depressed atm is because the remaining people living with me (Mom and 2 sisters) are moving soon from a house that we've lived in since I was 2 weeks old; short story its going in foreclosure and its really hard to deal with. On top of that.. my brother Oak (some of you may remember him in TMBO days lol) moved to live with my Dad out in fucking Utah because of school problems. For those that don't know he's pretty much my best friend and the only guy I could always talk to.. and now he's gone. Life is hell of boring when you have nothing to do. Makes you feel "worthless".

I'm sure a lot of you guys been through this type of stuff before but I dunno if I can take it.. my life is dragging on without any purpose it seems.

but on a plus side.. I finally got my damn driver's license. After 3 times taking it.. and almost killing someone.. I finally nailed it. ;]
Back to top
 

(Attachment deleted)

---===Whitest Cracker===---
...
 
IP Logged
 
SynthR
Tiger Woods' golf club (which is also his penis)
*
Offline


PSN - Xbox - Steam - Discord
= SynthR

Posts: 2983
Ontario, Canada
Gender: male
Re: Anger Management
Reply #9 - 06/13/09 at 14:56:25
 
Well hang in there Roket. My parents aren't doing too well with the house we're living in right now either. Not sure what's going to happen especially since I can't afford to live on my own if the shit does hit the fan. Times are tough right now for everybody.

Would you be able to move in with your Dad in Utah?
Back to top
 

(Attachment deleted)

---===Sexy Beast===---
---===Dirty Fishstick===---
---===King Axel===---
---===Mustard Man===---
---===Glowstick Commander===---
---===Grimmest of All Time (G.O.A.T)===---
---===Lousy Brawl Champion===---
WWW  
IP Logged
 
XIZOR
Tiger Woods' golf club (which is also his penis)
*
Offline



Posts: 7985
Re: Anger Management
Reply #10 - 06/13/09 at 20:56:34
 
Sorry to here about all that Rok and I can relate to most all of that. I can understand how it feels to move out of a house that holds all of your childhood and life memories. My parents got divorced when I was in 10th grade I believe it was and moving out of the house I grew up in was honestly more painful than the fact that my parents were splitting up. I loved that house. It was a fucking sweet place to live because at the time my parents bought it they were fucking loaded so it was pretty big and had a lot of land around it for us to play and just be kids. I still love that house to this day and every time I drive by it I get this feeling of longing and Im always tempted to ask the people currently living there if I could just come in and see the place again but Im sure they would think Im some kind of weird robber or something who just wants to case the place.

Of all my problems I do think most of them would start to vanish and things would fall into place if I just got a job as money, as much as I hate to say it, is a key to happiness and its also necessary to live. If I just had a job then I could work on buying a car, which would in turn allow me to go see my girlfriend. I could afford to go to the gym and work out or just buy a bike I could ride. I could go out and do stuff some times and have fun besides just sitting at home playing video games all the time. I could start buying a drum set again. And most of all it would help me not to feel like a pathetic waste of space.

On the whole job search thing, I was just wondering do any of you apply to places online? I hate that a lot of places tell you to do this now. Ive always been one to just actually GO to these places, show up, fill out the applications on the spot and talk to someone direct. Personally I think it shows a little more initiative than just sitting at home on a computer trying to figure out which god damn mother fucking piece of shit ass bastard blank space that you didnt fucking fill out right in order for the application to be accepted, which is btw the most fucking annoying thing about filling out anything online, much less in job applications. I also dont find this method to be fruitful at all. Ive never gotten a single call from any job Ive ever applied to online. It almost seems pointless to even do it. Not to mention, like Rok said, some of these jobs have insanely long and pointless things in the applications. The worst are those apps with the questions at the end that ask you about how you would handle certain situations at work and try to trick you into lying about your personality.

Honestly, since Im not having any luck on the job search right now Im thinking about just fucking lying on my apps from now on. I mean, nothing else seems to be working so why not just embellish some things to make myself more appealing. I already have to somewhat fib about not getting fired from past jobs so why not go the extra mile. My dad actually encouraged me to do this lately and even let my put one of his business line numbers down for a reference saying I should tell them Ive been working for him for years. I dont know, Ive just got to try something new.
Back to top
 

(Attachment deleted)

---===Asshole Of TMA===---
----===Winning===---
---===The Google Man===---
----===Alpha Admin===---
...
X1ZORTMA  
IP Logged
 
NightShade
Webmaster
**********
Offline


STABBING PEOPLE IS A-OKAY!

Posts: 811
MARZ WOOP WOOP
Gender: male
Re: Anger Management
Reply #11 - 06/14/09 at 00:04:12
 
I got my job online. I just went to careerbuilder and monster and all those kinds of sites and threw my resume at every applicable job I could find. Most didn't respond, but thanks to the sheer volume of applications, some inevitably responded (and it's usually quick and easy unlike the direct applications on some sites).
Back to top
 

(Attachment deleted)

YOU TOTALED YOUR SUSPENSION!
WWW  
IP Logged
 
SynthR
Tiger Woods' golf club (which is also his penis)
*
Offline


PSN - Xbox - Steam - Discord
= SynthR

Posts: 2983
Ontario, Canada
Gender: male
Re: Anger Management
Reply #12 - 06/14/09 at 05:19:54
 
I apply online for things posted but nothing really comes of it. I've had an interview or two. Most online sites are hiring agencies which I'm not too fond of.
Back to top
 

(Attachment deleted)

---===Sexy Beast===---
---===Dirty Fishstick===---
---===King Axel===---
---===Mustard Man===---
---===Glowstick Commander===---
---===Grimmest of All Time (G.O.A.T)===---
---===Lousy Brawl Champion===---
WWW  
IP Logged
 
PRS-man
Ex Member


Re: Anger Management
Reply #13 - 06/14/09 at 06:01:24
 
Back to top
 

(Attachment deleted)
 
IP Logged
 
Magnum
Admin
*****
Offline


What? Not now. I'm Masturbating.

Posts: 6060
Who wants the undies? Come on!
Gender: male
Re: Anger Management
Reply #14 - 06/14/09 at 16:28:41
 
"as money, as much as I hate to say it, is a key to happiness and its also necessary to live."

Yea. It won't get you everything but it sure helps. Funny how there are people out there that make millions and they're miserable. Makes no sence to me anyways.

That's what makes you being unemployed so shitty. There's shittons of people out there in the same situation, and you have to compete with that. I wouldn't really be so hard on yourself by feeling worthless anyway. I know what you mean by it but, there is some shit that you can't control.

I've always hated filling out applications. Esspecially those ones that ask you about situations, and what you'd do. Couldn't stand those. Some of those questions were the dumbest things.

"Would you prefer to run a short distance, or run a marathon?"

Ohhhhh...so when I say I want to run short distances because I'm not into marathons, I'm a fat lazy fuck.

"Would you like to be a clown, or a gymnast?"

So I'm a fucking lazy ass wize guy if I like clowns.

I also do it the old fashioned way too. I got to the places for apps. I didn't really care for the online shit because there was so much compition there.
Back to top
 

(Attachment deleted)

---===THE Applejuice Guy===---

---===SHITBALLS FOR LIFE!!!===---
WWW  
IP Logged
 
Pages: 1 2 3 
Send Topic Print